I wish I hadn't checked when I last uploaded a regular painting process video to my YouTube channel. I was quite happy with my warped memory of events; starting my '30 Ways to Fill a Sketchbook' series at the beginning of December and committing whole-heartedly to that as a stand-in for my usual content. The truth is, I was way off track before that. A whole two months before that.
In fact, while I'm typing, this is actually the first time I've actually added things up. Realising that the end of September/start of October when I last posted a painting time-lapse outside of my recent sketchbook project, was a whole five months ago!
That's five months since I last worked on a piece of art outside of my sketchbook.
Not just for filming purposes. I'm talking about real life, everyday. No wonder I found it so daunting to start. It's this feeling, this weird mix of being so not even remotely ready; not ready for the risk of committing to something on a larger scale, the plunge of sharing something to tens of thousands of new followers who've only known me for my sketchbook stuff, and the apprehensive back-of-my-mind voice asking 'Do I even know what I'm doing anymore?'.
But also so overwhelmingly ready at the same time; to break free of the confines of my sketchbook and create without borders, without limits. To return to a freer form of filming and editing. Shaking of the rigidity of the series and starting a new journey into the unknown. Something different.
I have to thank my sketchbook for everything it's given me over the last three months. I'm more confident, more adventurous. And, while I had my doubts, this latest painting has shown me that I have grown as an artist.
Am I allowed to say that I love it? Is that too boastful? Is it un-artist-like?
I know it's un-Minnie-like. To look at something I've created and think 'Hey, that's not bad. Actually, that's better than not bad. You know what, I think I might love it!'
There's always just been one thing I wanted from my art. I wanted it to be something I'd be happy to hang up in my home. Something I could proudly display to visitors and declare as my own. And somehow, 'Cranes' has managed to be just that.
And maybe, just maybe, this is the start of much more like that to come.
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This weeks video is out a bit late (you might not have noticed, I’ve been trying to get them up on Tuesday’s). Basically,
‘This is where the magic happens.’ I say in my D-list celebrity on ‘MTV Cribs’ circa 2001 voice. But really, despite investing countless